Friends are some of God’s greatest blessings to us in life, but have you ever thought about what qualities make a good friend?
In fact, Aristotle, a famous philosopher, says that good friends are virtuous friends. This means that true friends love one another for who they are and not what they can do for each other.
One virtuous friendship in the Bible is the friendship of David and Jonathan in 1 Samuel 18- 20. Jonathan was the son of King Saul in Israel, and David was a shepherd whom God chose to be the next king of Israel. In David and Jonathan’s friendship, they were virtuous, godly friends because they celebrated one another’s victories, were honest with one another, and encouraged each other to follow God’s plan for their lives.
First, rather than being jealous of David for being chosen by God as the next king of Israel, Jonathan supported David and celebrated the opportunity the Lord had given him. He could have chosen to be upset with David and spread lies and gossip about him. After all, Jonathon was the son of King Saul and next in line to the throne. Yet rather than focusing on what he wouldn’t become, he focused on celebrating what God had called David to become because he cared for David’s well-being.
A virtuous friend celebrates your win as their own win rather than becoming envious and seeing you as competition. When your friends make the team you wanted to make, get the grades you strive to achieve, or are in the relationship you want to be in, how do you respond?
Second, virtuous friends are honest friends. Jonathan knew that his father, King Saul, had a plan to kill David. So, instead of keeping this plan a secret, Jonathan chose to be honest with David and warn him that he was in danger. Virtuous friends are honest with each other and willing to tell the truth no matter what.
A virtuous friend is willing to be honest to protect their friend from danger; your friend may not be in danger of being murdered, but they may be making poor choices that will harm them. Are you a friend who looks out for the best interest of others and speaks truth even when it’s hard? Do your friends consider you to be trustworthy?
Third, virtuous friends encourage you to seek God’s plan for your life. Jonathan encouraged David that God had a plan for His life and that God would take care of David. Rather than trying to make David doubt God’s plan for his life so that he may become king instead, Jonathan comforted David and helped him to follow God’s plan and trust in Him.
A virtuous friend is confident in who God created them to be and rests in God’s plan for their own lives; therefore, they do not compare God’s plan for their life with God’s plan for their friends’ lives. Can the same be said of you? Do you encourage your friends to trust in God and seek His will for their lives? What type of voice are you in your friends’ lives?
Godly, virtuous friendships start with seeking God first. The closer you get to God, the closer you will be to your friend. Seek Him first, and your friendships will be virtuous like the friendship of David and Jonathan.
Written by Megan Jewell